You do not have to do it all and that is why my group is called Overworked to Overjoyed: because you don’t have to do it all, click the link to join our free community of parents (I go live once a week answering our questions) https://www.facebook.com/groups/overworkedtooverjoyed
Many of us are tired. When you’re tired and you’re frustrated you just do it all. You just do it for them, it’s easier than having a fight about it. So when they don’t feel like making their bed, or emptying the dishwasher before going out with their friends… then you just end up doing it. So we do it and we do it and we do it and then one day our head pops off.
Delegating is necessary because you don’t have to do it all!
The message you want to give is: This is a family unit , we all work together
Your manager doesn’t do all the jobs. No your manager says okay we’re running a meeting, who is doing what job? Some people vonteer olthers are told. A deadline is set and off you go. It’s time to be the Manager of your Home!
Are ready to make a change?
- Create a plan
- Get your children and partner involved
- Use the When-Then https://momthemanager.ca/product/when-then-and-first-then/
- Use visuals and checklists https://momthemanager.ca/product/morning-routine-task-and-start-reward-chart-2/
- Give them a choice of what chores they prefer to do
- Tolerate your distress, don’t do it all
Tolerate your distress: Don’t jump in to do it.
Leave it alone! when you fix it, clean it after they did, want it done a certain way… the message is: You aren’t good enough, do it wrong on purpose and I’ll just do it for you, this my job to do this, even though I say I want you to do it.
I’m sure you never intended to say these things through your actions, but you are. It’s time to change the cycle. Watch the video to learn more.
I used to do it all. I wasn’t good at it. I didn’t ask for help, my resentment started to build, then my husband put a mug in the sink instead of the dishwasher and my head popped off. It’s not about the mug! It’s because I didn’t have a plan. I didn’t ask for help. I just jumped in to fix it and then I was upset I had to do it all.
That’s why I’m called Mom the Manager. I started my business because we have to start managing, I want to show you how. When you start delegating and creating routines and doing those types of things for yourself and for your family good things happen. You are building independence in your children, you do not want them living in your home until they’re 50.
I know you want them to be able to get a job, know how to take a bus, make themselves some dinner or some lunch. Delegating and teaching life skills will get you started. Its going to take some time to teach them how to do things, to show them the way, but you have to get started. Think about your first step. Talk it out. Create a plan together. What do they need to get started? A check list, a timer, a reward chart, for you to do it with them a few times?