Your IQ influences 20% of your success in life. Emotional intelligence gets you far in life.

  • Talk about feelings, label your feelings and their feelings, read books about feelings.
  • Deal with emotions in a helpful way: relaxation, read, cuddle with a stuffy, notice nature…
  • Give your child empathy. Be a good role model. Teach them how to be considerate of other people’s feelings:
  • “Of course you’d be upset”
  • “Sounds like a tough day”
  • “Oh no that sucks”

Emotional intelligence is understanding your feelings, knowing how to deal and control them in a positive way. It’s being aware of other peoples feelings. This will help them feel better about themselves. They will feel more in control of their feelings, instead of the other way around.

It will help them connect with others. It will help them build strong relationships and keep them.

Learn what upsets them and help them work out whether they have control over it or not. Make a plan together. Using the example above, if your child said that they have questions at school but are too nervous to ask, brainstorm ideas to help.

  • Ask an easy question first.
  • Put an eraser at the corner of the desk as a signal they need help.
  • Ask at recess.

What works best for them? Ask them. Try it out. If you’re still stuck go back to your plan and find some new alternatives. Having being emotions and holding them in all day is tough. The end result is usually poor choices or behaviour. Help them with their emotions first.

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